The soft buzz of my phone vibrating alerts me to the fact I have an unread message. I pause what I am doing to deliberate. Do I break my concentration to read the message? I try to focus on the book I'm studying, but the magnetism is too strong.
My fingers slide across the screen, anticipation rising, unbidden. Someone, somewhere, wants to talk to me, if the short bursts of traded information that are texts can be called talking. I touch the unopened envelope, and the text appears.
My mom checking to see if I need any groceries.
The anticipation ebbs a little, as I respond. I exchange the phone for my studying.
The soft vibration distracts me again. I reassure myself it's only my mom again.
The soft vibration distracts me again. I reassure myself it's only my mom again.
It's not! A is responding to an earlier question. Our exchange lasts a few minutes, then she doesn't reply. I check the phone occasionally, though I know it would have notified me of a new text. Half an hour goes by, and I wonder why I care so much about the five word reply.
I know why, without wanting to.
I know why, without wanting to.
Every time the little envelope shows up, it validates me. I am worth contacting, and interacting with. On days when the screen is blank, my mood is a little dimmer. It seems that everyone else's lives are so busy, and I am left behind. Waiting.
Why does the chime of my phone cause me to drop everything to respond?
It's the sound of someone wanting me.
This was a pretty recent journal entry. God's been convicting me of how many distractions I let into my life. He's been challenging me to push deeper into our relationship, and to rest in His presence. Ask any of my friends, and they'll tell you resting is not my thing.
Since the Christian walk is full of challenges, here's one I'm laying down for myself:
Continue to give God part of my day, but do so with intention. This has been a pretty big plank in my eye. SO obvious, I've chosen to ignore it. The first step to fixing something is recognizing it's broken.
I would say wish me luck, but I don't believe in luck, so prayers would be appreciated!
May you be blessed!
Star
Why does the chime of my phone cause me to drop everything to respond?
It's the sound of someone wanting me.
This was a pretty recent journal entry. God's been convicting me of how many distractions I let into my life. He's been challenging me to push deeper into our relationship, and to rest in His presence. Ask any of my friends, and they'll tell you resting is not my thing.
Since the Christian walk is full of challenges, here's one I'm laying down for myself:
Continue to give God part of my day, but do so with intention. This has been a pretty big plank in my eye. SO obvious, I've chosen to ignore it. The first step to fixing something is recognizing it's broken.
I would say wish me luck, but I don't believe in luck, so prayers would be appreciated!
May you be blessed!
Star
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